They’re no singles clubs, but it turns out, both of the Valley senior centers have produced their share of love matches in recent years.
Several couples have met at, married, and then moved on or moved away from the Mount Si Senior Center under program coordinator Janet Fosness’s watch, she recalled, and she never knows when a new one is forming.
“There are definitely seniors who come in looking for that,” said Fosness, “and then there are the accidental ones.”
At the Sno-Valley Senior Center in Carnation (temporarily located at Camp Don Bosco during a remodel), one such “accidental” couple just gave up trying to keep their relationship a secret, and endured some vigorous teasing for it.
“Janice, no talking…Janice… JANICE!” said Betty, whose four-year relationship with George is “out of the bag” and fair game according to fellow bridge player Janice, who’s rattling off jokes about hot water bottles and cold feet.
“Beats me how she found out,” says Betty, with a shrug.
Asked why they tried to keep a low profile in the first place, Betty bursts out “Because of her!” with a finger pointing to the still-joking Janice.
A lot of seniors try to keep their relationships quiet, according to Sno-Valley Senior Center program coordinator Amy O’Bryant. “People at this age are very private, so sometimes you don’t know.”
Amara Oden, Sno-Valley Senior Center director suspects it is a generational characteristic, and that it might change as the center reaches out to more, and younger, Baby Boomers.
“Seniors are still interested in that kind of thing,” she said. “It’s the perfect place to come… You end up spending time with people in a comfortable setting, finding companionship, really getting to know them.”
Both senior centers are working constantly on expanding their programs to attract more people, and particularly more men to their programs. Women tend to outlive their partners, but are used to reaching out and networking, says Oden. She wants to make sure she reaches the men out there who are newly alone and may need help.
However, with a lopsided gender ratio, about 70 percent women to 30 percent men, neither center could really focus on romance, even if it intended to.
That’s a relief to some members.
“Oh heavens no!” says Mount Si member Gloria, her eyes wide. “We’re not here for the romance, we’re here for the food!”
Her friend, Edith, also a widow, said she came to the senior center every week for lunch, for the knitting club, and for friendship, but that’s it.
“I’ve been a widow for 30 years… I live with my kids, and I need adult stimulation, if you want to put it that way,” she said, “My husband was my romance, I’ve had the best.”
Dating might be the problem. With a dating pool of about twice as many woman as men, and no recent experience with asking someone on a date, many seniors are intimidated. At another table in the Mount Si dining room, Karen, happily married, compares their single friends to fish out of water when it comes to modern-day dating.
“The usual people here, they want the friends, they don’t want the romance,” she concluded.
Then, from over at the first table, an unidentified voice says “Speak for yourself!”
